36 | How Do You Know When It’s Time For a Change?

This is the first of three episodes in a mini-series looking at questions around the theme of change. The ideas I explore have come from our Haven Theme Kota at the start of September. In this episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast, we explore the signs and signals that tell us something has changed or something is ready to change.

You can download our digital cue cards that will help you navigate a season of change.

If the idea of a calm and connected 60-minute call with me sounds helpful, we can focus on an area of life you’re looking to integrate or instigate change in a Pick The Lock session. Learn more here.

How Do You Know When Change is Knocking At The Door?

It doesn’t always occur to us that something has, needs to, or could change in our lives. Because of our adaptive skills, we might drift in undesirable directions and accept incremental shifts away from the path we would otherwise choose. Or, in the face of shifting circumstances, it might not occur to us that the habits, behaviours, and choices that were appropriate for the past are no longer serving us.

What tells you something HAS changed?

When you take time to observe and reflect, what signals tell you something has changed? Changes happen internally, externally, culturally and in our interpersonal relationships.

Recognising the signs can give us a better understanding of what our feelings, thoughts, and actions are telling us about the needs beneath them. When we notice our default patterns, we more quickly interpret and understand what they say. Because so often, we find ourselves in that limbo season, feeling overwhelmed, confused, and disconnected. Not realising that it’s because we’ve not noticed something HAS changed or needs to change.

  • The meaning has shifted
  • It feels different
  • The connection is lost
  • I’m doing the same thing but getting different results
  • It has become easy (I have grown/developed the skills)
  • It has become hard (I am no longer able to do what I could before)
  • It has become diluted (what used to seem special is everywhere)

What indicates to you that it’s time for something to change?

When you listen to and observe your mind, body, and spirit, how do they indicate it’s time for a change? In the episode I expand on the following:

  • I’m procrastinating
  • I experience a pressing feeling in my head, body, and throat
  • I feel something stirring inside me
  • I keep noticing signs that resonate and reinforce my intuition
  • I wake up in the night worrying
  • I am increasingly restless and bored with my current situation
  • I feel annoyed, grumpy, passive-aggressive, and negative
  • I am lethargic and struggling for motivation
  • I am jumping from one thing to the next without being able to settle
  • I write the same thing in my journal every day
  • I keep making the same mistake without learning from it
  • I feel like I’m just going through the motions
  • I feel disconnected from, disinterested in, and afraid of a future where things continue along this current path
  • I am treading water in limbo – waiting for something to happen
  • I sense a small, calm voice within telling me to do something uncomfortable or scary

Pause and Listen

Try not to act until you know which state the voice of change is speaking through. Gut instinct and intuition can come from different sources.

Ask yourself: Am I currently in a defensive (urgency/panic) or connected (creative/flexible) state?

Notice how you finish the sentences, “the world is…and I am…” (in a defensive state you will see words that indicate a sense of threat and scarcity e.g. the world is hostile and I am lost or the world is demanding and I am getting left behind). This idea is from Deb Dana’s book, Anchored.

Find a cue (e.g. a favourite song, memory, or image) that helps you move into connection and safety in relation to your capacity to navigate change within your spirit of possibility, curiosity, and creativity. Now, complete the sentences again: “The world is…and I am…” (in a connected state you might say “the world is beautiful and I am open to what it wants to show me”)

From a state of connection invite yourself to reflect on these questions:

  • How will I slow down and connect with what’s alive in me today?
  • Where might my curiosity want to take me next?
  • What might I need to accept, acknowledge, or release?

Does this feel like a time of change for you? I’d love to hear more. Please let me know in the comments, drop me a message, or mention me if you share this episode on social media.

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