This week’s show looks at how we might find margin and space in our schedules so that we can say yes the right opportunities, no to the wrong ones and engage with the ultimate objective of living a life that we actually get excited about rather than one that simply keeps us going through the motions day after day.
I identify 11 key filters or mindset shifts that we may implement:
1. Realise that You’re Not a Slave to Opportunity
2. Change your Relationship with Potential Opportunities
If you don’t feel excited or energised by saying yes to something that you are choosing then you may get excited or energised by being able to say no.
3. Practice Saying No
Saying no is difficult. When unsolicited opportunities come through don’t just ignore them. As much as possible practice the discipline of saying no graciously but without excuses.
4. Implement the Philosophy of Hell Yeah or No
A few years ago Derek Sivers declared his intention to try out a new philosophy:
“If I’m not saying “HELL YEAH!” about something, then say no.
Meaning: When deciding whether to commit to something, if I feel anything less than, “Wow! That would be amazing! Absolutely! Hell yeah!” – then my answer is no.
When you say no to most things, you leave room in your life to really throw yourself completely into that rare thing that makes you say “HELL YEAH!”
We’re all busy. We’ve all taken on too much. Saying yes to less is the way out.”
5. Never Allow Anything Other than Enthusiasm to Dictate a Decision
Have you ever just settled for something because you’re desperate? This rarely leads to a positive outcome.
6. Don’t Choose Something Simply Because You’re Good At It
Have you ever listened to a podcast by someone who knows what they’re talking about but has no passion or enthusiasm in their delivery? I have. And I never listen again.
Don’t say yes just because it’s something you CAN do. What’s the point if you don’t actually care about it too?
7. Be Honest With Yourself
Be a student of yourself.
We can easily overlook the fact that we are just going through the motions, doing stuff simply because it’s what we do and what we’ve always done.
8. Be Pro-active
We are waiting for permission, awaiting a response. But this kind of reactive living is the thing that causes us to say yes to the wrong opportunities in the first place.
9. Just Because you Initiated, Doesn’t Mean you Have to Say Yes
A big one for us introverts/HSPs is loyalty. If we initiate an opportunity or ask for something it doesn’t mean we become powerless in it being offered.
10. Be Constantly Evaluating
We never reach a state of perfect equilibrium. In the same way as you will probably always have clothes in your wardrobe you don’t wear, life will always provide us with things we say yes to and then need to say no to down the line.
Keep on top of it so that you don’t require a radical clear out every 6 or 12 months.
11. Embrace Your Authority
“You have the potential to live a powerful self-directed life of your choosing, but until you step into your true authority, this potential remains a fantasy.” – Steve Pavlina
Over to You
Question: What gets in the way of you living the most effective and impactful life you can imagine? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Get involved in the comments below.
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